Grief in the Age of the Digital Natives

Our hamster died several days ago. Maybe a month ago, but nobody paid any attention to the thing so we’re not really sure how long ago. I discovered Choji lifeless in his cage while I was doing laundry. Usually I can hear him burrowing around or biting on his cage, but I didn’t hear him at all. So I kicked the cage. When he didn’t peek up at me with his beady little rat eyes, I summoned Bryan because I do not play with dead animals. He had only days before extracted a dead possum from under our porch, so I knew he’d know what to do. He poked at Choji and reported, “He’s really stiff. And kind of deflated.” I gagged and ran away. We couldn’t tell the kids right away for a couple of reasons. 1. It was very near bedtime and I knew Maya would use it as an excuse to stay up forever and I couldn’t just say, “Yeah, I know you’re sad, but go to bed!” 2. I couldn’t say it with a straight face. I might have been a little bit happy.

So we waited a couple of hours while I rehearsed in the mirror and Bryan put Maya to bed. Then we told Lena and Liberty. Liberty said, “That’s ok, I was kind of sick of him anyway.” Lena cried a little bit and then, Digital Native that she is, said, “I’m going to make a slideshow of Choji and put a sad song on it and post it on my blog and my Facebook.” She’s very proud of it, so I’m posting it here, too. By the way, when she posted it on Facebook and received condolences, she responded, “Yeah I miss Choji, but doesn’t the song go good with the slideshow?” I can’t wait to see what she does with my funeral.

In the morning when we told Maya, rather, when we remembered to tell Maya, she cried a tiny bit. We had the funeral that night and she cried more. Choji’s death has made her more concerned about when our cat Kisa dies or when her friend’s pet dies, though. She wonders how they’ll bury a big old lab, she wonders if we’ll get another cat (yes), and all three girls want to get another hamster. ??? The answer is no. We will all just have to wallow in our grief over our one and only rodent. I will never miss seeing him put his butt up against the cage in order to pee or poop outside of his nest. That just ain’t right. I can deal with a lot of things, but an ugly, smelly rodent is not one of them.