I’ve been reading memes lately because I have nothing better to do, and I want everybody to know that they can start calling me by my porn name (1st pet, street I grew up on), which is Pooty Corunna. Also, I know you’re wondering Who I Would Choose to Write the Song of My Life. I’ve thought about it a lot and I’ve decided I would choose Eminem. I think he’s funny when he’s not being scary and I would like to see, given my entire life story, who he would choose to stab. Also, he grew up in Detroit and I once went to a La Leche League conference in Detroit so I feel him.

You probably guessed I would choose Eddie Vedder, right? I would have, except I don’t think the song of my life should be a love song and Eddie would have a really hard time writing anything other than a love song if I were the subject. Because he loves me. He already wrote that great line in Black for me “I know someday you’ll have a beautiful life, I know you’ll be a sun in somebody else’s sky, but why, why, whyyyyyyyy can’t it be, why can’t it beeeee miiiiine?” Any more than that would just be embarrassing.

Happy Saturday.