I Will Marry Michelle Obama
Her husband will make it legal, and then we’ll get married. It will be teh awesome. Ok, maybe I’m not going to marry her, but I want to have her over for coffee and be friends. And I promise I won’t stalk her. Did you see her? Wasn’t she great? Did you cry? This:
The Barack Obama I know today is the same man I fell in love with 19 years ago. He’s the same man who drove me and our new baby daughter home from the hospital 10 years ago this summer, inching along at a snail’s pace, peering anxiously at us in the rearview mirror, feeling the whole weight of her future in his hands.
And especially this:
And as I tuck that little girl and her little sister into bed at night, I think about how one day, they’ll have families of their own. And one day, they — and your sons and daughters — will tell their own children about what we did together in this election. They’ll tell them how this time, we listened to our hopes instead of our fears. How this time, we decided to stop doubting and to start dreaming.
Oh, and I love her brother Craig as well. New plan: My official story will be that I’m an orphan on the streets of Chicago and if Craig and Michelle’s mom doesn’t adopt me, I’ll turn to drugs and stuff. That’ll do it. I’ll be their sweet baby sister who is way dumber than they are, but they’ll be nice to me anyway and we’ll have Christmas together in the White House and we’ll laugh and laugh together all through the holidays. Because that’s what families do. God bless us, every one. Sorry, Mike and Tracey, but I’m gonna go be somebody else’s baby sister. I bet Craig and Michelle wouldn’t ever have put horseradish in my mouth if I fell asleep on the couch when they were babysitting. Repeatedly. Also, they probably would never have chanted, “Abby wears bobby socks! Abby wears bobby socks!” over and over again to make me cry. Most importantly, Mike, I’m sure Craig wouldn’t have recorded some devil music crap over the darling tape of a 3-year-old me singing “Beth” and “Hot Blooded.” See ya, suckers. I’ll write. Maybe.
August 26th, 2008 at 8:08 am
I need a new family more than you, plus I called dibs last night.
You know, I wasn’t totally feeling Michelle until that speech. I liked her and all, but I really connected with her last night. There may have been tears.
August 26th, 2008 at 8:30 am
Your too funny-sorry you were born into a typical American Family-hope your second family treats you better!
August 26th, 2008 at 5:02 pm
But you like horseradish…and crying..
August 26th, 2008 at 6:14 pm
Limbaugh was not teary-eyed over her at all. I won’t break your spirit and tell you his comments. In fact I’m going to shut up right now before I ruin our friendship. I can’t wait until this election is all over and done with. Kaput.
August 26th, 2008 at 6:42 pm
@mechelle I’m not surprised Limbaugh didn’t shed any tears; I would imagine it would be hard for him to experience any emotion other than fear and racism (”a relative’s hut”? WTF?) when it comes to the Obamas. Nothing a little Oxycontin won’t fix for him, though.
@Tracey LIES!
August 27th, 2008 at 3:37 am
I will cut you if you take her away from me.
August 27th, 2008 at 8:55 am
@Kathi D Bring. It. On.
August 27th, 2008 at 1:12 pm
On the other hand, we could SHARE her. (I’m scared.)
August 29th, 2008 at 9:35 am
I love her. I know this probably sounds corny, but she inspires me. I read an article on msn this morning that said “I think she is the perfect reflection of what every woman in America would like to be.” I think that is so true. I feel so patriot. I was a Hillary fan because i think she is incredible smart and knowledgeable, but she will always lack that softer side. I think Hillary hates her husband but would never leave him because it’s bad for polities. Either way the Democrats are getting my vote, but now i just want to tell everyone how great she is and how great her husband is and scream out VOTE for him Dam it….
way to much coffee in the morning.
August 29th, 2008 at 2:12 pm
Tracy, if it’s corny, then I’m corny, too.
This is shallow, I know. But I love the way she dresses. No pantsuits for her. She manages to look like a hot young woman, yet understated at the same time. And those little girls are so perfect, as if they were selected from a catalog.
Last night’s Obama speech got me so fired up! I was watching with several other rabid fans, and we looked at each other after it was over and said, “Could this really happen? Can we REALLY elect this man?” We have been beat up by the political process for so long now that it’s hard to hope.