Sundays with Stretchy Pants

This blog is fun for me for a lot of reasons, but the main reason for its awesomeness is because it tells me when somebody googles something and then finds a link to my blog and clicks it. That’s right, I can see that somebody googled “pants too tight right ball hurts” and then clicked on a link to my blog. WTF? You need google to tell you that you need to change your pants? Seriously, go change your pants. And then google, “why am I so stoopid?” and see what you come up with.

That’s weird, but the weirder thing is that most of my search terms have to do with anorexia (I’m not counting the person who searched for “softball butt” because, let’s face it, that’s totally not the same thing. It is, in fact, quite the opposite thing.) My number 1 and number 2 most popular search terms that lead somebody to my blog have to do with that disease. The rest of the terms are so random that they can’t even be categorized. However, I’m keeping my eye on “methamphetamine Chesaning” and hoping that it becomes a contender for the top spot. That would be cool.

Anyway, I have one post that mentions anorexia and you would have to search through thousands of google pages to even find my link. Maybe I’m in the minority, but if I google something and it doesn’t come up on the first 2 pages, I figure my question must be unanswerable. After page 2, it’s like eating from the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil. It’s just not for me to know. And by then I’m usually distracted by something shiny anyway.

I see search terms like that, that make no sense at all for this blog and then I get all wrapped up in wondering what it was the people were truly looking for and where did they finally find it? And how did they have that much stamina to go through that many pages of info? And what were they supposed to be doing all day? But I guess they don’t have to cook much, so that frees up some time. And no cooking means they wouldn’t have to clean up, so there’s that too. And you have to factor in the amount of time they save on just the eating part. Well, and the meal planning and the grocery shopping. Ok, nevermind. It makes a lot more sense now. I don’t know what I would do all day if my day didn’t revolve around the choosing and preparing and consuming and cleaning up of food for myself and certain others in this place, but I suppose I might spend a teensy bit more time on the internet clicking random links. It makes perfect sense now.

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